I want something that I want…

I just don’t know what that something is! I’ve reached that point where I feel that my job is just that… a JOB. It’s not supposed to be fulfilling, it’s not supposed to be rewarding, it’s just supposed to pay our bills. Is that jaded or is it realistic?

I’ve had jobs before that were horrible and harmful to my emotional/mental well being. For example, I had a job where they called me the wrong name for 6 months which made me feel sort of worthless as a person. I had another job where I was expected to replace my supervisor that had quit even though I did not have the qualifications to do his job and I felt so overwhelmed that every morning I had to convince myself not to call in sick.

My current job is not horrible in so far as I can get up and go to work every day without wanting to pull out all of my hair… but it isn’t very fulfilling. I don’t feel like I’m a valued employee or that my work makes a difference in anyone’s life. I am a hard worker and I enjoy being challenged and motivated… two areas that are lacking with my current role at my job.

Still, work is work and at least I have a job, right? Or is it right? Should I be dissatisfied with not finding fulfillment in the work I do? Should I look for employment elsewhere? What do I want to be when I grow up?

What are my passions? Well, I put some thought into it and here’s what I came up with:

I love organizing things – from spreadsheets, schedules and “to do” lists to desk drawers and office supply rooms – I find calmness in things that have been well organized. I adore having a “system” that works. I love creating training manuals and SOP documents, because I believe if everyone is on the same page it makes understanding each other and your problems much easier. However, I also enjoy identifying potential issues and working on finding a solution to those issues before they become problems. I take pleasure in helping other people do things they didn’t think were possible. I love setting small and large goals and take pride in meeting them. While I like to be challenged and I like to learn new things I find repetitive tasks to be relaxing and enjoy doing them as well. I like having a can-do attitude. I appreciate a job well done.

So, now that I’ve thought about what I’m passionate about… what does that mean? Where should I go from here? What do I really want?